Don’t Hide Your Emotions

I am an emotional person and I embrace it. If fuels me. Anyone who really knows me, knows this.

By emotion, I mean I’m not just talking about crying when I am hurt or when my kids are hurt. I cry at movies (happy and sad). I cry when a player I coach achieves something they thought they couldn’t. I cry when I hand out the end of year sports awards and see just how far they have come. I cry watching reality TV when a singer, dancer, performer gives the performance of their life. I cry when the national anthem plays at a sporting event, including the beginning of my races. My kids are always picking fun at me. Mom, are you crying again?? Yes! Yes, I AM!

Now those might not seem that unusual, but they are sometimes frowned upon in the business world. I get emotionally invested in the success and failure of those I coach and develop. Watching someone succeed, especially when they didn’t think they could, is what keeps me motivated. I have teared up when someone who works for me hits a goal they thought they couldn’t, when I share success with a team goal, at our yearly kick off or end of year close. Most people have said not to show that level of emotion at work. But guess what? That’s not me. My team always knew I cared. They knew I had their back. They knew their success was more important to me than mine was. I knew if they were successful, I would be successful. People wanted to work on our team because of our culture of hard work and success and compassion; I was even told because they wanted to work for me.

I cry and I coach because I get so passionate about personal break throughs. I get the most pleasure out of helping someone achieve something they thought they wouldn’t.

I recently spent time with my best friend from college who I had not seen in a while. During the 4 days we spent together she cried at least 5 times. All were happy tears. But every time she did her first response was, I never cry. You just always have a way of pulling things out of me I didn’t know were there and encouraging me to follow passions I had been putting on the back burner.

Embracing and expressing your positive emotions can be a powerful tool for developing personal connections inside and outside of work.

So, I say cry if you want to! Be vulnerable. Be positively emotional. It drives the energy that makes things happen. Don’t keep it bottled up. Use it! The more positive emotions that are attached to something the better the outcome. Get emotionally attached to you, your passions, your purpose, your tribe.

Your Turn

Here are a few journal prompts to help you explore your emotions and how they can drive your energy and passion.

What emotions do I feel most strongly on a daily basis? How do these emotions influence my actions? Are they positive or negative?
Describe a time when I allowed myself to be vulnerable and express my emotions. How did it make me feel?
What are some things I am deeply passionate about? How do these passions make me feel?
How does my emotional state affect my productivity and creativity?
What are some ways I can express my emotions in a healthy, constructive manner?
How can getting emotionally attached to my goals enhance my motivation and drive?
What is my ‘why’? What emotional connection do I have with this purpose?

Remember, emotions are a powerful force that can drive us towards our goals and dreams. By understanding and embracing our emotions, we can harness their power and use it to fuel our passion and purpose.

5-Minute Cup Filler Exercise

Here is a 5-minute daily exercise to develop your skills around leveraging your emotions to improve your daily outcomes.

Choose to be a better version of yourself every day.

Think back over the last 24 hours.

BECOME AWARE: Name one negative emotion you felt during the day you would like to change – Or – one positive emotion you can leverage you want to feel more of.

BE GRATEFUL: Rephrase this occurrence into a choice you can be grateful for.
I am grateful for __(insert emotion)___ because it gives me a chance to __(insert change you are seeking)___.

TAKE ACTION: What is one action you can take when you are aware of the negative or position emotion to change or increase it? Name an additional action you choose to take throughout the day to reinforce.

Choose to commit to repeat daily until you build your emotional intelligence muscle, and it becomes natural!